Today’s topic is very simple, but it can have huge impacts on mindset and wealth as a result. Yesterday I did an outing with an amazing group of photographers where we learned all about flash. Can I tell you I was in love! It was so fun. There are so many creative applications to using flash. It lit my creative heart on fire. Then I come home and go on amazon right away because I want this stuff bad. I scroll through, pick out all the things I want.. then I go to checkout and the panic hits. I can’t buy that. It’s frivolous. It’s irresponsible. I have other money goals I’m working on and this will take away from those. Close cart.
Then I go and edit all the super cool pictures I took that morning and get excited all over again. I’m already envisioning so many fun projects with this stuff. Re-open cart. Again, panic at the total and close cart. Later that evening I was out sitting on the deck and it occurred to me.. I can make extra money to pay for it!
I don’t need to sacrifice my goals to have these new fun toys. (This is not the plan here at all) I don’t need to do without them either. Denying myself the fun things I want in the name of responsibility is a dirty bad habit I have and I’ve been doing it from the time I got my first five dollars. Even with all the mindset work I’ve done, it still isn’t an automatic all the time.
Here’s why this is important.. fun is the point of life! Did you know that? I didn’t. Life is supposed to be enjoyed. Life is not meant to be suffered through. We are meant to enjoy the shit out of it while we are here.
For me this flash equipment brings so much joy. So instead of shutting it down immediately because there’s not enough money to have those fun things and look after my commitments (scarcity mindset), I turned it around and asked myself, how can I get what I want and look after my commitments too because I deserve to have joy in my life (abundance mindset.)
Those are two very different states of mind to be in. One leads to over-responsibility, not a lot of fun, I don’t deserve the good stuff mindset, blah kind of life. The other leads to a balance of responsibility and excitement, all kinds of fun, boosts self worth, and leads to a much more rich experience of life.
Here’s what I found, if you always put off the fun things, you will never get to have much fun. It’s not greedy or selfish or any other thing to want some fun in your life. We are here to have fun. There is no award for biggest martyr I’m afraid to say.
Joy doesn’t always have to cost big money. It can be a cup of coffee at the beach, or a dance party in your kitchen. It can be free. I am not arguing that. In fact, I highly recommend that too. Just don’t automatically ditch fun things and experiences because they cost money either. Build joy into your daily life and into your budget. If you focus on it and make it a priority, it will grow. I promise. It is different for everyone. It might be an instrument you’ve been dying to learn, it might be a vacation. For me it was a rose bush last week. Today it’s some flash equipment.
The automatic no to fun is something I have to work on. It doesn’t come naturally. I’m a recovering self-sacrificer. It takes work sometimes to remember that I’m supposed to get a piece of the fun too. I don’t think twice about buying my kids a new scooter or instrument or anything like that that will bring them joy and experience. Me getting ok with buying myself some fun things and experiences doesn’t take away from my ability to do that for them. In fact, the fact that I’m out having fun, means that I am more light and fun to be around, which is a significant win for them too.
Moral of the story.. sometimes you just got to stop saying you can’t have, and start asking how can I have? It’s a game changer. For me the answer was pretty easy. Do a few extra photoshoots to make the extra cash. I could only get that answer by asking the right question though. Try practicing that question in your own life. What is something you want just for the fun of it? It can be big or small, doesn’t matter. Then ask yourself how you can get/ do it. You will get an answer when you look for one. It might be to make more money. It might be to cut something out that doesn’t matter as much. It might take some time to make happen. That’s ok. Then follow through and do the damn fun! You deserve it.
Lots of love
Dawn
Tax Wise 