It’s December! How did that happen so fast? The Christmas music is now on every station and decorations and lights are up all over the neighborhood. This is the time of year where I would normally enter into panic mode over gifts. Last year I drastically changed how I do Christmas and particularly the gift giving part. We all know that the season is really about time together and not just the material swapping of items, but it’s easy to get swept up in it all. I’ve got some tips and ideas on how to cut costs around gift giving, and more importantly, to cut the guilt.
- Draw names. If you have a large family or if you exchange gifts with a large friend group, etc this can be a great idea! Instead of buying for 8 aunts and uncles, you draw names and only shop for one. The drawing of names or the exchange can even be turned into a fun reason to get together.. because ya know, we can do that now.
- Ditch the gifts all together and just have a get together. Remember when all we wanted was to get together with our loved ones? What better time to start a new tradition with exactly that in mind. Have a hot chocolate and movie night, or a potluck, or any other type of get together that tickles your fancy. I can bet that most of those family members would rather spend some quality time with you than to have a half-hearted gift.
- Let go the guilt gifts. If you are stressing out over what to get a person because you don’t really know them, or because you feel obligated to get a gift, this is your permission to not. Just ditch it. It might be nice to get gifts for hairdressers, teachers, coaches, great aunt so and so that you haven’t seen in a year, etc., but you really don’t have to. If you want to, give’er. But if it isn’t coming from your heart, it defeats the purpose. Cross the name off your list and be done with it. No one wants to buy guilt gifts and no one wants to get them either. If it’s a person you always exchanged gifts with you can chat about it first, but that’s up to you. They might also be relieved to stop the exchange. I had a chat with a few friends a number of years ago and it was well received by them all. I know they love my kids. I love theirs. We don’t need more nerf guns and stuffies to prove it.
- Cut the ‘what will they think’ worry too. This one got me a whole lot. I would often spend more than I could on gifts just to keep up with what they had given me in previous years, or because I was worried they would think I was cheap or that I didn’t care. It really is all foolishness. If anyone is basing the health of your relationship on what you gift them, it’s probably not a relationship you should be too worried about.
- Bring back the Christmas card. I would much rather get a hand-written note in a card than a pair of socks or a gift card. Just sayin. We can ditch the attempt at showing our appreciation with gifts and just say our appreciation with words. I love to get pictures of loved ones too.
- Home-made gifts are also lovely. Since my kids were born, we made gifts for grandparents and loved ones. Whether it was art made with their feet prints, or later their own creations, these are the most treasured gifts I feel. I could go out and buy something to put their name on, but these gifts are from their heart and that means so much more. It doesn’t just go for kids either, you can share your talents too. It can be artsy things, or baked goods, plant clippings, babysitting, snow clearing, etc. Giving of our time and effort can be a lovely way to show you care without the swipe of a card.
- Cost doesn’t equal value. Someone had asked Landon what he wanted from them for Christmas. He asked for a roll of tape. I can tell you this kid will be very happy to get a roll of tape. The cost doesn’t equate to enjoyment. There is no need to spend $30 or $50 on toys, when he really wants tape. I feel like this idea comes from a ‘what will people think’ place too. It has become as much about what people think about what we buy for someone as it is about what the person might actually want or appreciate. This is another reminder that what people think about your gifts doesn’t mean shit. It’s between you and the person you are giving to. It doesn’t need to impress family who wants to see what you got and it definitely doesn’t need to impress facebook land either.
Gift giving should come from a place of wanting to give. If it’s coming from a place of obligation or of trying to appear a certain way, I hope this can be a little validation that it’s ok to just not. It might sound trite, but Christmas is really about spending time with the people you love. If you are stressed to the max over the idea of gift giving, you are not enjoying the holidays. Trust me I’ve done it. Cut the list. Cut the urgency. Cut the weight of other people’s opinions. You’ll find a whole lot more room for fun and relaxation.
Lots of love
Dawn
Tax Wise 